Faith in Yourself and Doubt
We have already said that the most important quality that makes a person a Magus is the fluidity of thought, the critical edge of perception, and the capacity for doubt. It is precisely when a person begins to dare to challenge generally accepted norms and values that he receives a chance to step beyond the confines of the cramped everyday myth that fetters freedom. The Magus knows that all knowledge and all experience — including what has long been accepted as firm and enduring truth — must be subjected to the test of doubt.
We also said that the only thing a Magus must not doubt is his Way. For the Magus, doubt must not be self-serving or limitless. It must yield a clear, evident conclusion about the truth or falsity of the judgment under examination. In the end, out of doubt — and, paradoxically, despite doubt — the indubitable principles of the Magus’s existence must be built in a strictly grounded sequence.
However, it can seem that the idea of the Way becomes a new dogma and that doubting it is forbidden. In fact, this is not so.
Many who set foot on the Way of Magic, when they meet resistance from the world, begin to doubt both themselves and their Way. Often this makes the Way seem False, the powers illusory, and the Magus loses his bearings and falls away from the Way. The loss of faith in oneself is one of the greatest dangers for a Magus, and the forces for whom the Magus’s growth of mind is profoundly undesirable understand this well. Failures in magical undertakings that undermine the Magus’s faith in his own powers are often inspired for the sole purpose of knocking the ground from under the practitioner’s feet.
And it is often difficult to find that subtle line — the Way that leads to stable inner support— the line between faith in oneself and megalomania, and, at the same time, between self-doubt and disillusionment with the Way. It is vital, on the one hand, to have faith in yourself and, on the other, to recognize and be aware of your limitations — while still trusting your power and your Way and continuing to walk even when the force of resistance seems insurmountable.
The first steps — both in life and on the Way — are always taken with excitement and strain. A person (so long as he is a person) can never be fully certain what consequences this or that action will bring. This means that in his actions a person must always be extremely cautious, and also tolerant and attentive to any viewpoints about the possible consequences of those actions. At the same time, it is important to develop and continually broaden the horizons of knowledge. It is unknown what results such development will bring, but the chance of solving the problem increases. A person has no sufficient grounds to judge confidently and unambiguously what his ultimate goal should be (the best available result of his activity), and therefore he must strive to reach such a degree of development that these grounds will appear. Because a person must come to know what he does not know, he must improve himself in all respects; and because it is difficult to determine what results particular measures may lead to, self-improvement must be cautious— that is, critical toward oneself and attentive to every point of view.
Good Angels
Village Magic and Witchcraft
Tribes of the Gods
Impulses of Power
The Atts of the Runes
Mother of Fate
Arcana and Secrets
Power or Energy?
I would also like that. Can you teach me?
In that case, to not lose faith, one must learn to see the aura of people. That would be enough to know that if you can do that, then everything else is also accessible 🙂
Hmm… And still, one question continues to torment me: can magic serve as a ‘religion’ for a magician? Should a magician believe in magic, in its effectiveness, similar to how they believe in gods, or is magic a precise science that requires primarily knowledge and understanding of techniques?
Both approaches are possible. Magic will work whether a person believes in it or simply precisely reproduces the ritual.
Thank you. I answered my own question.
Sometimes the minutes of “realization” that Your Path is “false” (given to us by our companion well-wishers) cost us months of wandering in the darkness of disbelief and powerlessness.
SOMETIMES MORE THAN MONTHS, ENLIGHTENMENT IS GIVEN FOR A MOMENT AND THEN DARKNESS DESCENDS.
No, there are no steps whatsoever. You are right, Svetlana, it’s darkness. I don’t know where to go, what to do. It is all just a game in magic. I cannot do this. When there is no clear direction given to me, I wander. I understand that I need to do something, but what?? Guessing… flailing? They do not teach magic on the internet. Stupidly pretending to be a seeker and saying that I’m looking for a path… nonsense. You read these lines and say another one has given up like.. who cares.
This is indeed how it happens. You don’t know where to go, and you can’t go on like this, and you even ‘give up’, but then you realize that returning to the semi-alive, semi-asleep human consciousness is even worse, it’s like death. And you understand that it’s better to guess and flail, and so until the next enlightenment, until, with the accumulation of experience and will, the periods of darkness become shorter and are replaced with illumination. No one ever called the Path a pleasant stroll through a paradise garden.
Why are you stirring people up.. why are you pulling them into magic. You know well, it’s a dead end for most. They don’t teach online… for the majority, a dead end is… just games. And now I feel that I can’t live without it.. that it’s mine, but I don’t know what to do and it’s bad for me.. I’m burning all over.. What, should I turn to cults or sit at home and pretend to be wise? YES, this is nonsense and you know it.
And about returning to the ‘world’ of people.. where is this world? I do not see it. I see only emptiness.. illusion. Everything is virtual. I have started to see this emptiness. And my next step is to try to find the real within this illusion. To sift and gather grain by grain what creates this Reality. The whole secret is that it is around us, but I just haven’t yet understood how to see and realize it. It may be in the rush of the wind, or in the twilight silence of rocks.
Numen, they really don’t teach magic online. I have been trying not to miss a single publication of Enmerkar for several years now – He does not teach magic on his site, but He extends a hand and helps to walk this path. Moreover, even if My worldview, My Myth does not coincide with His Myth. You can write to Me at My email: cheb_rostov@inbox.ru, maybe I can help with something. Sincerely, M.
This happens either when the intensity decreases or when the thread of the path is lost https://en.enmerkar.com/magus-way/xolod-i-pustota, accordingly, you must either apply more effort or look for a way out of the dead end. There surely is one, just a step away from you, but it’s very carefully disguised. It might be this direction of magic, which seems uninteresting so far, a close person whom you don’t notice, nature, or some activity; perhaps your teacher is already waiting somewhere for you. But usually, some distractor, a false understanding of things, prevents seeing this. I would like to ask you, Enmerkar, if there is a possibility and need, to write more about this state, or to give links if you have already written. This is a frequent and painful state for many travelers, especially if there is no Teacher.
In such situations, reviewing your possibilities and impossibilities, the accessible and inaccessible paths, etc. may help. Read: https://www.enmerkar.com/en/runes/freedom-on-ones-own-land
There are plenty of teachers around. The presence of a Teacher will not help if you do not commit yourself 200%. The Teacher does not walk your Path for you… If the Teacher has indicated a direction, it does not mean that it will be the easiest in that direction… A warrior is forged in battle, a softie grows in a cradle… Mage and Warrior are practically synonyms 🙂
There are several magical sayings-aphorisms about ‘faith in oneself’ that are useful to remember and not forget… for seekers and travelers. An elderly wise woman would often repeat to her 5-year-old granddaughter: ‘- Strength is forged like steel.’ An elderly wise man loved to say to his 7-year-old grandson: ‘- Be as solid as a rock, but do not become a stone. – Shout but pull.’ The starting point, the axis line, the golden section, support, path, and map, God and temple, Universe and the key to it – in your garden, never forget this, whatever the raging ocean around whispers.
A lot can be written beautifully about Magic and the Path. I will explain. No one refuses to work. No one refuses the Path. When I first got into and got involved in this blog in early 2010, I was happy. It was truly work. I spent several hours each day studying each article. At first, it was difficult with understanding, but then it became easier and clearer. I realized a lot, and sometimes my consciousness couldn’t process and absorb everything, which manifested in heating my head (literally). And I think it is incorrect to say that En does not teach magic. There was a genuine teaching taking place. At least, this blog, in my opinion, was conceived this way. There was a transmission of Power, and those who wanted, took it and grew. But later, the transmission of Power began to dry up, and the blog turned into answers to questions. Perhaps it was intended as a benchmark to strive for. But after tasting the noble wine and appreciating its taste, I do not want to drink anything else, than to drink whatever. This does not apply to those who currently help me to move on and gift faith in my strengths. Another point I would like to pay attention to and which is somehow omitted is that Magic is primarily Continuity. This is the Transmission of Knowledge accumulated over millennia. I should not invent the wheel. Yes, I must walk myself, and no one should pull me along, but at least at the beginning, the one who pushed me and whom I took by the hand must walk beside me. And to write that this blog is not Magic education is unnecessary. This is not true.
“…But later, the transmission of Power began to dwindle, and the blog turned into answers to questions.” ……………… “Now you yourself provide answers to the questions…”
The essence of Enmenkar’s blog is to learn to think
with your own head, analyze, compare,
and the blog also provides a foundation for those who have just embarked on the Path, those who are just starting,
those who walk the Path behind which there are many ups, downs, disappointments, and joys will find in the blog exactly what was lacking for overcoming the abyss and gaining Strength and Wisdom.
I have come to the conclusion that magic is primarily the exploration of One’s own consciousness. When you take a torch, descend into the depths, and do not know who or what will meet you around the corner. You carefully take a step, look around… Some black shadows scatter from the light… Here’s a crossroads.
Aha… there’s some white glow ahead. Let’s see what the light is… oof… it’s cold and unfamiliar. I’ll go further. It’s a bit scary, but I need to go on. No one will lead you by the hand.
And most importantly – to build your fortress there. My consciousness is My home.
It really resonated with me. Oh, how I understand… Sending you warmth!